DEAR ABBY: Last year, two of my former classmates bought a house next to me. I don’t mind one of them, but the other one, “Evie,” is a snippy know-it-all with a sugar daddy boyfriend. He looks down on everyone. In addition to yelling over the fence when they see us outside or on our back deck, they have invited my husband and I over to their house for dinner and happy hour on several occasions. I made excuses, but they ran out. I have no intention of accepting these offers. My husband thinks we should “just get it over with” and go, but I’m afraid accepting that will open more doors. Help me! – NO THANKS, IN WASHINGTON
DEAR NO THANKS: Your husband may mean well, but I agree with you. Do not accept. Keep telling Evie and her friend that you have “other plans” and pray that they eventually get counseling.
DEAR ABBY: For several years I have consulted a medical professional I call “Eric” for certain problems. Eric’s wife “Nina” and I were very close friends. Our families celebrated holidays and special days together. However, during our friendship, Nina shared many details about her personal life with me. They are now separated.
Knowing these details makes me feel very uncomfortable seeing Eric. I want to see another doctor at the practice because that’s where all my records are. I don’t know how to ask for another doctor without giving any reason, and I don’t want to insult Eric professionally. Any advice please? – TIME FOR A CHANGE
DEAR TIME: Depending on the size of your practice, you may not be asked why you want to change. However, if Eric confronts you, all you have to say is that you’d rather see someone else from now on. period If you are questioned, take your business and any records that belong to you — to another specialist in another practice.
DEAR ABBY: I am divorced. I am semi-retired, work second shift four days a week and have an easy job. I draw social security and live comfortably. I like to drive my 4WD and go mountain climbing with it. My problem is that people always say I should work harder than I do. I’ve paid my dues my whole life and it makes me angry because people seem to get over the fact that I’ve done it and they don’t. It takes a lot to hold my tongue. Please get back to me ASAP for these people. – HEARD
DEAR PATIENT: Resist the urge to pretend you have it and they don’t. The quickest return is a smile and a “Why?” will ask. If someone is concerned about your well-being, make sure you are comfortable with how your life is. If their motivation is something you suspect, they may be able to answer your simple question.
Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby http://www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.