One dating app, thanks to Abby Chatfield, has taken a big step forward with the introduction of a new feature to accommodate the new relationship style.
Hinge includes a “relationship type” plugin where people can specify whether they’re looking for or have a non-monogamous relationship, are looking for monogamy, or aren’t sure what they’re comfortable with.
The new feature includes details like your age or occupation.
At this stage, users will not be able to use this feature to filter by relationship type over things like gender or age.
While a staggering 86% of people claim to want a monogamous relationship, there is a growing trend among the LGBTQIA+ community and Gen Z towards this dating style – also known as ENM or polyamory.
In essence, relationship style takes many forms, but at its core, both partners in a relationship experience romantic or sexual attraction to multiple people and act accordingly.
Logan Uri, director of relationship science at Hinge, told news.com.au there are many misconceptions about non-monogamy, such as cheating or that people who are committed have commitments.
She adds that just because you’re in that relationship style doesn’t mean you can’t cheat—every relationship has rules and boundaries.
Uri added that there should be clear boundaries and research before committing to monogamy.
“Find out why you’re not interested in monogamy. “The foundation of a successful and healthy non-monogamous relationship is honesty,” she told news.com.au.
“You need to be able to talk to your partner from the beginning about what you’re comfortable with, what your boundaries are, how you handle trust violations, and so on. topic.
“Maybe you both want to explore emotional or physical intimacy with more people. Maybe you’re interested in exploring relationships with people of the opposite sex.
“If your answers sound like ‘all our friends are doing it’ or ‘it solves our problems,’ don’t skip it.
“Monogamy is not an effective way to hide from relationship problems. In fact, it often magnifies them.”
He says it’s important to educate yourself when starting out, for example by reading books Opening up: A guide to creating and maintaining open relationships getting a clear understanding and also talking to people who know who are doing the practice.
Uri added that it’s important to figure out that monogamy isn’t for you.
“Unlike traditional monogamous relationships, there’s a lot more room for interpretation when there’s no monogamy. If you ask eight couples what their non-monogamous relationships look like, you’re likely to get eight different answers, because clearly there is no definition,” he said.
“For some couples, if someone is at a conference out of town, they might wear makeup occasionally, but not a lot. Other couples have rules about not sleeping with someone in their extended friend group.
“A friend of mine can sleep with other people, but not more than once. These rules should be determined in advance.”
Conversations about protection, contraception, and sharing knowledge about getting to know your partner should also be shared, she says.
But at the end of the day, making time for your core activities and checking in regularly is the key to tackling your new adventure together.
With celebrities like Chatfield being open and honest about their relationship style with their exes, it’s led to many people seeing monogamy as something that isn’t in pop culture.
This, according to Uri, was very important to make others feel comfortable.
“When celebrities in non-monogamous relationships share their stories, it sparks important conversations about the ins and outs of those structures,” Logan said.
“It inspires other people to explore new possibilities and find the type of relationship that works for them.”
While other apps like OKCupid and Feeld have similar features, including a section where you can link profiles to your partner, Hinge is the first mainstream app to officially recognize different relationship styles.
According to Uri, the increase in requests for non-monogamy led to the app including relationship types.
“At Hinge, we love to think holistically about how to serve the unique experiences and personalities of our meeters. Ultimately, we want to enable our users to find intentional and meaningful relationships,” he said.
“It can be very frustrating when you meet someone and find out that one person is looking for monogamy and the other is not.
“Our new feature allows everyone to see at a glance at profiles if the other person has the same relationship goals.”